The Amigos de la Vida Foundation is located 25 km from Quito on an agricultural farm. This project is a temporary shelter for children, who are extremely vulnerable, ages 0 to 4 while their family crisis persists. Children’s parents and relatives, therefore, play a pivotal role in our activity.
Both welcoming children and monitoring their cases are determined on a legal basis. However, it is in the field of real-life practice and in the type of environment and care that we provide to children and their families where we, to a certain extent, distance ourselves from conventional practice in order to present our proposal: caring for a child as a legitimate "other person" while offering daily confirmation that it is entirely plausible to foster experiences of love and understanding to children during this sensitive period in early childhood.
Our work is a continuing effort to convert research and studies in neurobiology and other fields of knowledge into tools that enable us to comprehend the laws governing the development of human beings and to create settings that facilitate their fulfillment.
At Nuestro Hogar, we have set an environment that fosters the true needs of children. This is a relaxed atmosphere where each child can manifest him or herself and open up to self-therapeutic processes, to expressing their discomfort, to self-discovery, and to finding their own interests. In this environment, we have observed "miraculous" recoveries that are possible without resorting to drugs or painkillers due to the care of adults who, in turn, use delicate gestures and timely, accessible language that take into account the child’s logical state and the affection given without conditionings, pressures, or expectations. All this aids in the recovery of their sense of acceptance, of feeling loved, and of being able to trust themselves and others. The child’s personality also emerges from their first autonomous experiences, which develop round feeding and motor activity. At Nuestro Hogar, under no circumstance do we force-feed children. We respect their signals of satiety, fullness, or intolerance. We offer indoor and outdoor spaces so they can develop their skills; here, special attention is paid to the presence and non-interference of adults. Children with similar developmental processes share common spaces.
The sensitivity, intelligence, and ability of the child are evident at all times, both in making decisions to collaborate with their caretakers as well as in choosing the clothes they choose to wear, the workstations and materials they wish to use, and the time allotted to do so. The role of adults requires constant readiness to understand children, and it is geared to provide quality nutrients, comfortable clothing (that adapt to their movements), and appropriately-created materials that suit their needs. We enrich the physical environment used by children by noting details in their motor, emotional, personal, and social manifestations in order to correspond to their legitimate interests in this important stage of their lives and by encouraging the development of their many skills.
This vital process, which is unique in each child, has significant manifestations: internally, in an appropriate maturation of their neural structures, which, as we know, can only come at this stage in their lives and which is projected on the strength of their being. Externally, it is expressed in great achievements in their ability to overcome obstacles, make decisions, collaborate with others, respect house rules, and discover the goodness of limits, which enable them to see beyond their own perspectives and make it possible to live adequately and generously. We talk about the recovery process of children with a wide range of neurological damage—physical or emotional abuse, overstimulation, abandonment, lack of facilities so that they can express themselves—caused by inappropriate settings for their lives.
To ensure the health of children, we make use of home-made remedies that take the rich tradition of our peoples and forefathers. This allows us to have a warm, human, personal approach to the child's affliction. Nonetheless, we do not rule out the use of medicine or medical care in particular situations. We note that children’s health problems disappear very quickly in this environment.
Nuestro Hogar is neither a methodology nor a charity. It is primarily a way of life. Beside a sense of attachment, affection, and good care, how can we instill values to our children? We can incorporate a social sentiment only when we live respectfully, not when we are obliged or conditioned by "values", which force a double morality.
Luis now shares his personal effects after having had several experiences where we have confirmed that there is something that belongs to him, which can only be taken under his consent. We did not pressure him, and we do not tell him that only good little boys share.
With each passing day, Lola increasingly allows other children to be cared for, after having taken care of her needs. We continue to care for her with great dedication when needed.
We do not force Joseph to eat, and he enjoys everything that is offered to him.
Sarah has been experimenting with the use of cutlery and expresses what she likes and how much of it she would like. Peter practices balance. Paola makes her bed. Ivan does not want to spend more time in the garden.
The adult becomes smaller in order to have a respectful relationship and to see eye-to-eye with the child. On walks or during other activities, adults hold, not squeeze, the child’s hand and do not hurry them. They go at their pace. Thus, the child can calmly accept invitations and enjoy other environments. He or she can relax without conditionings and take baths in a schedule they like without haste.
Routine references are paramount in the child's life, particularly in building emotional security and in the development of temporary structures. Each child is aware of what happens to them, their surroundings, and what lies ahead. Nothing happens at Nuestro Hogar without children knowing in advance, so that they may be calm and emotionally fit to respond to new circumstances. By taking them into consideration, we are also allowing children to incorporate the feeling of being accepted and loved.
Children have the opportunity to play outdoors while being in touch with nature. Inside, beside the areas that allow for the different experiences of the child, adults offer several activities in which the child is free to participate, such as dance, music, arts and crafts, manual projects, and story-telling.
The child’s life is nurtured by many details. They observe us, they perceive us, and they imitate us. Everything matters: how we talk to them, touch them, close the drawers, lay the carpet, and greet and say ‘goodbye’ to them.
Children express a real pleasure in helping out: sweeping, washing dishes, putting materials back where they belong, setting the table, cleaning the table, storing food in its place, and putting away their clothes. We notice, with great surprise and joy, this "sensitive period of order" about which Dr. Montessori has argued. The kitchen is open to toddlers who are able to walk and eat by themselves. They truly enjoy cutting lettuce, spinach, and chard! The adult who prepares the meals also becomes small and carries out his or her activities at a table accessible to children. This adult is always visited by our young, curious spectators, who have the opportunity to taste food in its different states. There are so many emotions in preparing and eating cake—not just on birthdays—and in gathering chicken eggs, in feeding the chickens, in watching these with their chicks, in visiting the pig, guinea pigs, and rabbits, in going for ice cream, in discovering the neighborhood and its trades when going out on walks, regardless whether the day is warm or not. So many things to discover! So much to live for!
There are many other important tasks that revolve around Nuestro Hogar: the reintegration of the child in his or her family or in an environment that promotes their development, the dissemination of these tasks, and the support of other initiatives in different areas of the country.
When a child arrives, we have a moral responsibility to find their family. Furthermore, to contribute to their process of identity involves not only providing the proper environment described above, but also doing everything possible to provide information about the place from which the come. If possible, they will return to their parents or relatives. Also, the family is aware of the child's life in this house. Parents or relatives can always see their kids and visit the different environments we offer. We do not use judgements of any kind to relate to them. They as well as their children are all respected and accepted. Once the child goes home after having welcomed and monitored their family, the Foundation continues the monitoring process on a long-term basis by scheduling regularly-scheduled visits, which are not determined by the authorities, yet we still carry them out because we want the family’s reintegration to be successful. In cases of financial hardship, the family is supported by the Foundation via small loans, looking for scholarships, or through monetary contributions until their situation improves. As a last resort, we follow adoption procedures.
We would like to continue doing the necessary monitoring and to demonstrate that families with this kind of background are able to lead dignified lives and form an honorable part of society. We are also interested in setting precedents and influencing public policies, in ensuring that State agencies address this issue, in monitoring the lives of children and their families in special situations, and in ensuring their welfare.